Single Parent Hacks: Work, Dating, Wellness

Check these useful tips out on the Huffington Post: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jenn-lyons/single-parent-life-hacks-_b_8327964.html

Life Book - 2015!

A good friend sent me this email called "Life Book 2015" and I thought everyone could use a quick read:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.

17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.

18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over-prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

36. Growing old beats the alternative - dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

45. The best is yet to come.

46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

48. If you don't ask, you don't get.

49. Yield.

50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

I thought I needed a husband...when what I needed was a wife!

After five years of single parenting, I finally broke down and admitted that I needed help. A wonderful girl from my work offered to come over and help me with Grace.  I offered to pay her, as I knew she was saving to buy a house - and I desperately needed the help.

She came over and played with Grace while I made dinner and took care of a few things around the house. Then she ran an errand and cleaned out Grace's too small clothes from her overflowing closet. (Next week she is going to hang something for me - she even knows how to use those illusive anchors which I've never figured out).

By the end of the night, Grace was relaxed because she didn't have to spend so much time playing by herself while mommy was doing "house stuff" - and I was relaxed because someone took the pressure of being the 100% source of entertainment while simultaneously handling household responsibilities.

When she left, I enjoyed a nice glass of wine and dozed off to sleep with a smile. For so long I thought that I needed a husband - it turns out what I needed was a wife!

Now she comes every week for one miraculously night where my to-do list is cut in half and my child goes to bed happy. I strongly recommend a mother's helper for any single mom (or working mom) - go get one today!

Avoiding a dating hangover.

Cognitively I realize that meeting someone ends one of two ways: you end up married (or committed together) or you don't.  Nonetheless, it didn't work out with the 'almost dating' tennis player. He swept me off my feet when I first met him, but when he returned to the daily grind, he was all 'take' and no 'give'. Although I enjoy his company very much, I don't want a fun weekend here and there when it is convenient, I want more...I want it all. So I told him it felt more like a friends thing because it seemed that we were on two different pages.

It is so hard to stand up for what you want in the long run, when in the short run a romantic date would be awesome. It's a bit like deciding to take a shot when you are out - you know it will make for a fun night...but it's going to hurt after.  How often do you find yourself saying "So glad I did that shot!" - usually it is "I wish I hadn't done that"  So in the spirit of avoiding any dating hangovers, I've closed this chapter and am looking forward to a new one starting.