Juxtapositive

I’d like to report new and exciting adventures however at the moment I am stuck in a bit of juxtapositive state along the path to becoming Wonder Woman (yes, I made up the word Juxtapositive).  You can’t short cut your way to Wonder Woman status, nor can you speed up a healing process (that unfolds in it’s own time). So for right now, it is a melancholy juxtapositive feeling:

• The sad feeling arrives each day when I think about the life I dreamed of that is now gone. Along with relief is underpins the sad, knowing that the negative aspects that would have eventually destroyed me are also gone.
• Focusing on building, planning and putting things in place to fill Grace’s & my life with joy. Along with not yet being in a place where I can feel that joy.
• Relief that the anxiety of dating is gone now that I’m flying solo for a while.  Along with missing the companionship of having someone consistently around*

*Footnote: I was once told I should call people jerks more often when they deserve the title, as I frequently will be 'overly-understanding toward them. Well, to the one who said being friends was his top priority, you are a jerk!**

*Footnote to the footnote: Communication with the Twinkie has dwindled to nothing. Thus qualifying him as a  jerk under the category  ‘sends mixed messages’.  Please ping me if you need help with jerk category classifications.