Monday, December 17, 2012

Lesson unfolding - part 2

I still haven’t heard back from The Runner, so this post does not include the big finale!

I was thinking about the Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto. The proclamation of exactly what I want to give to Grace and what I want Grace to have as a result of our relationship.

Here are some points from the manifesto:
- Above all else, I want you to know that you are loved and lovable. You will learn this from my words and actions--the lessons on love are in how I treat you and how I treat myself.
- I want you to engage with the world from a place of worthiness. You will learn that you are worthy of love, belonging, and joy every time you see me practice self-compassion and embrace my own imperfections.
- You will learn accountability and respect by watching me make mistakes and make amends, and by watching how I ask for what I need and talk about how I feel.
- As you begin your Wholehearted journey, the greatest gift that I can give to you is to live and love with my whole heart and to dare greatly.

To these points, I am doing the right thing. Would I want Grace to settle for less than she needs?  Would I tell her she is unreasonable for wanting a relationship in her life that isn’t 50% good and 50% work, but instead 90% good and 10% work? Would I tell her she is not worthy of love because her imperfections are too much?  It is heart-breaking to write these questions because the obvious answer is no. So why then, would I live in such a way that Grace learn from my less-than actions?

It’s time to break my family’s tradition of unworthiness and write a new story (literally, as that’s what I’ve been doing on this blog, isn’t it?)

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