Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Tinder Date 5.2: Coming on Too Strong

I went out with Helicopter Guy (aka Tinder Date 5, #2) last night. He is the nicest guy with a very goofy personality. In the 2 days leading up to the date, I received many cheery texts, filled with emoticons. I didn’t know what to make of it. I appreciated his positive comments, but when they were turned toward me, they began to feel like pressure.

So at the end of the date, I told him that I need things to stay toned down when I meet someone so that I can get to know them without feeling nervous. He said ok...and then stumbled and asked for more information. It was clear that he had no idea that this consistent communication and overly cutesy comments were scaring the daylights out of me!  So I said that sometimes when people come on too fast, I get nervous and that gets in the way of me really getting to know them. He immediately apologized and said the last thing he wants to do is to send me running for the hills (did I mention he has an entire arsenal of midwest colloquialisms? Cute!).  Though once he got home, he texted and asked me out for saturday.  Normally I would be jumping for joy at such an invitation but so far him coming on strong has translated into pressure and has made me uncomfortable. So I’m not sure of the next step. I don’t want to miss out on the opportunity to get to know someone who consistently makes me laugh with his goofiness and who takes things lightly so that you remember to take the world less seriously. But I also don’t want to feel any pressure or anxiety as I’m getting to know him!

Help!  What do you do if a nice guy comes on too strong?

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